Workout with Kevin, jobs with Mikayla and Talia picture

APRIL 4, 2024

WELL, I simply NEED to write this every day because I’ve found that when I don’t write it, I don’t have a great recollection in what actually happened during the last day. Let’s just talk a bit based on my photos and see where that gets us. In the morning, I did my personal training session with Kevin, and I actually ended up having wonderful conversations with him. I even told him that I’ve been thinking that I don’t want to take selfies with people for my photos of the day unless we actually have had a meaningful conversation, since I basically used to just grab anyone who I was around and ask them for a photo to get it done with. At any rate, I really did have some wonderful, meaningful conversations with Kevin today. 

I told him that for the last few weeks I’ve been thinking while training with him, “why do I even want to get stronger or better?” due to my depression. He told me that he personally tries to stay consistent in his own training and nutrition because he’s “always trying to get better.” In a way, talking to him about all of this, I kind of arrived at the thought that a true positive of the brain injury might be that it has given me something "to recover from." I even told him how before the brain-injury-car-crash made me go to physical therapy, I had never once entered a gym in my life. So in a way, it’s helping me to get better than I ever was. Far from hating the guy who ran me over, I think now that he’s kind of given me a new chance at life by re-starting my life from 0.0. When I finished with Kevin, I went home and pretty much immediately had a therapy session with Whitney. She talked about how what I really want isn’t exactly “independence” per se, in that it’s more that I want ownership and agency in my life. I also arrived at the thought again that the brain injury has gifted me with something to "recover from." After that, I headed over to Neighborhood Café to meet up with my job coach, Mikayla. I ALSO had a great talk with her. We’ve decided to re-start my job coaching services now, and I’ll continue to explore potential options, both with her and alone. I was also very clear that I’m no longer exclusively looking for a job that includes speaking Spanish, given that all of my volunteer work includes a ton of that. And I want to fill my life with multiple activities, so I’ll definitely continue to keep a good portion of the volunteer working while I’m able to work my low-hours part-

time job.

Ok, and when it became night time, Talia and I met up for dinner at Himalayan Restaurant. I asked what language they have on their menu, and apparently it’s Nepali, which Talia didn’t know was a language. Talia and I also had some nice talks about me looking for the low-hours and not-too-highly-paid job. In a way, her job at Half Price Books would satisfy the requirements very well, and we’re considering looking at other book shops. Anyways, what I ordered at Himalayan Restaurant was their fried rice with garden vegetables and some shrimp. The portions were quite large, and we both ended up taking food home in boxes. Oh, and we also floated some ideas for our trip to Florida that’s coming up in May. We think at some point we’ll definitely do what Hannah and I did last year, and we’ll stop at a brewery together. Let’s jump back to the morning now.... I got my makeup on and I grabbed a really big pair of earrings to wear, which I don’t remember ever having worn before. I also took my meds at 8:30am with a snack breaks pack that I had in the fridge, that had cheese and crackers. I mainly ate the cheese, because I knew that’s what had the fat content. And then at night I went for it at 9:01 pm with about half a bar or these toffee ice cream bars that have 22g fat for the entire bar. That’s a great way to do it when you’re not deeply hungry, tbh. 

Oh, and I forgot to mention this, but I also finished editing my photos from the Theatre in the Round play, God of Carnage, and I sent them to Larisa. She told me that there were some "good shots here" even though I personally hated the photos that I took on last Wednesday, and I feel like I missed a lot.